Saturday, February 25, 2012

Dear Wallpaper,

It has only been 6 months since we met, but that has been plenty of time for me to form my opinion of you.



I'm sure, given time, some of your styles would have come back into vintage vogue...


...but I worried what effect the visual stimulation would have on my growing children.
So you had to go.


I have spent hours, no...DAYS... in uncomfortable places...

...gaining wallpaper removal experiences that have me living in fear of other closets in my home.

Dealing with your painted-over mess has sent me to the doctor for a tetanus shot.

Plus, your odd placement around the house (behind the kitchen cupboards)...

...has me scratching my head with confusion (closet ceiling).


I'm sick of the mind games, Wallpaper.  Coming off so easily on one wall...

...yet causing me to gouge the drywall on the next with your stubbornness.
And let's not forget what I found under a layer of painted wallpaper.  What was that?  Oh yeah, more WALLPAPER!

So I'll play along with your little "find the wallpaper" games for now, but sponge paint can only disguise you for so long.

The "writing's on the wall," you brittle, smelly paper...


...what remains of you will soon just be scraps on the floor.
 
Hear that?  Sounds like the roar of my Paper Tiger...along with the delighted squeals of my spray-bottle-wielding children.

It won't be long now...
 
Love,

            The Lady with the Scraper

5 comments:

  1. That wall paper was frightening!!!! LOL! I tell you hon you need a Scunci Steamer or The Shark Steamer. I love mine and it worked like a charm on removing wall paper!

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  2. That is incredible amount of wallpaper! Good luck with the rest of it!

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  3. Even though I've been there since the beginning, I had forgotten how many different wallpapers there were in your house. You can do it, your almost there!

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  4. This is such a hilarious post! I love it and I'm sorry about the tetanus shot :( I have demolished a kitchen that had layer upon layer of linoleum, so I slightly understand your situation. I of course was scraping towards concrete though not drywall, so you win. :)

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  5. Holy wallpaper!! That is one of the most horrible displays of wallpaper I have seen. It is reminding me of the horrors of wallpaper that used to be in my kitchen in The Dalles.
    Good Luck!!!

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